Oh Snap! Shots Friday...errrr...Saturday

We are in Delaware doing a bit of traveling. My husband has to work down here for a few days, so we decided to drive down and join him. I just got connected to the internet in my hotel room. It took me forty-five minutes. Me not so tech savvy.

Anyways, my husband said he'd do the laundry while we're here. (I 'bout passed out.) There's a washer and dryer where he's working, so he volunteered. I was pretty excited because now I won't have to spend afternoons in a laundromat with my two boys like I'd expected. It's a win-win.

Or so I thought.

This morning when I woke up to find the laundry, it was still in the dirty bag...wet. Oh, he'd done the laundry all right. He just hadn't dried it. So, I guess that's on the agenda for tomorrow. I'm sure it will smell all kinds of wonderful. But, God love him for volunteering. (Can I reiterate that the clean clothes were put back into the dirty bag? You guys know how I feel about recontaminated laundry!)

Speaking of laundry...

In real life...

Oh Snap!

Laundry piles up.
"Wait a minute... Where did the baby go? "

Little Ones Love to "Help".

You have to buy more detergent because
someone decides to play in the laundry powder. 

You can't even do the laundry because your
husband is "fixing" the dryer...

Laundry is hard to stay "on top" of.

Thanks for the precious pics you sent in! I should have snapped a pic of my laundry room in my scary basement. I went down Thursday for the first time since having surgery back in early June. Yeah. It looked like a small explosion had occurred. Oh well. A momma's work is never done...

Next week's theme for Oh Snap! shots is "Dog Days of Summer". Send me pics of your summer stuff. Funny vacation shots, creative outdoor games, front porch hang-outs, indoor activity mishaps, or funny pool shots. Anything SUMMER! 

So, what are you guys doing this summer?? Please share! 

Dang Twitter

I stripped Peanut down. His clothes were soaking wet from playing with our redneck water table. (that's another post entirely) Anyways, he was running around naked for about five minutes. He ran into the pantry/mudroom and closed the door behind him.

I snapped this funny pic to share with you.

But, when I opened the door to get him, I realized he had peed...on a box of jello.

Shoot.

I cleaned it up, threw away the jello and went to get a diaper.

Then I made a bad call.

I paused to Twitter about the box of jello.

I figured I had a couple minutes before he decided to christen the sugar, flour and boxes of cereal. I finished tweeting, grabbed the diaper and looked through the door.

He was bending down to touch something...brown.

Wait a minute...that looks like...

Shoot! Dang Twitter.

That's A Bunch Of Bull

 That's a bunch of bull.

A few years ago, my husband and I were sitting on the couch watching a rodeo. (Yes, I know that seems stereotypical for a Southern couple, but we really aren't the rodeo type. We only like watching the bull-riding part. What can I say? We like violence.)

As one guy was being tossed around like a rag-doll, I made a simple statement to my husband.

"That bull looks a lot like a cow. They are even built the same, only that has horns."

Shock and horror filled my husband's face.

"Um, that's because it is a cow with horns. It's a bull...you know, a male cow", he said.

Now, I don't know if I was absent during that discussion in kindergarten or what, but somehow I had missed that point.

In my mind, there were dairy cows and meat cows. Bulls were an entirely different species. And each of those three species had male and female. Male dairy cows? Yeah. I see now how ridiculous it sounds, but I just never put much thought into it I guess.

I know what you're thinking: "This creme puff's quite possibly missing some filling", but let me say that I was a straight-A student! I did great in school, but, after years of adult-oriented reading, my basic knowledge of animals was lacking. What I needed was a crash course in animal-ology.

And thankfully, my husband was there to help me. Here are just a couple of things he clarified for me:

Rabbits are adult bunnies. Bunnies are just baby rabbits. A bunny is a rabbit, but a grown rabbit isn't a bunny. 

You can see how I was confused. I just assumed there were two names for rabbits. I remember reading baby books with my first born and pausing when I came to a page with a picture of these furry little creatures. "Should I teach him rabbit or bunny?" It was a tough decision, but I was a grown-up and by golly, I had to make the call. So, I just said both.

"Chicken" is a general term for roosters and hens. Roosters are male. Hens are female. But, they are both "chickens".

I was upset. How come they get a general term and titles for males and females? My husband tried to explain. "We are humans. But, there are men and women humans." Whatever. Don't try to explain complicated chicken terminology.

Now, before you de-friend me on Facebook or write me off as a dumb brunette, let me just say in my defense...I've moved a lot in the past few years, had two kids and I don't wash my produce like I should.

PS. Did you know that Caribou and Wombats are real animals?!!! Thank you, Baby Einstein...

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Male Anatomy 101

My brother and his gorgeous wife, Jennifer.

I was a newlywed working as an assistant manager at a bookstore in Newnan, Georgia. My husband and I had only been married a few months and life was extremely busy.

In the back office one day, I received a fax from my Mother that read,

                                                       Bri,                                                                                      

Here's the information you need....

By the way, your brother's surgery went well.

Love, Mom

Brother's surgery?!! Um. Hello! No one had even bothered to tell me about that one. He, too, had just gotten married and apparently was as busy as we were... seeing as he didn't even let his own sister know he was going under the knife!

I got home from work late that night, and immediately called my brother the moment I climbed in bed. My precious new sister-in-law answered the call. They were youth ministers at a church in North Carolina. Here's how the conversation went down:

Me: "Hi, Jenn. I got a fax from Mom today saying Jeremy had surgery. What's going on?"

Jenn: "Oh, sorry we didn't let you know. We've been so busy. He had his tonsils taken out this morning."

Me: "Oh good; it's nothing serious. That makes me feel better. Well, is he doing okay?"

Jenn: "Oh yeah. He can't talk, but he's feeling better. His tonsils were terrible! The doctor said he had never seen anyone's gonads so swollen."

Suddenly, her voice turned away from the phone and in a frustrated tone, she spoke to my brother...

Jenn: "What Jeremy?!! What did I say? What?"

Now, I'm no anatomy expert, but I knew something about her statement did not sound right. While my brother was desperately trying to communicate to her without using his voice, I covered the phone's receiver with my hand and asked my husband, "Honey, what are gonads?"

Yep. She was waaaaay off.

Me: "JENN! Gonads are guy's balls!"

Jenn: "WHAT?!  Oh no!! I have called every elder and some members of the church telling them that the doctors could not believe how bad Jeremy's tonsils were because his gonads were so swollen!"

My brother was embarrassed. My sister-in-law was humiliated.

But, as for Me and my Husband? Yeah, we laughed so hard we couldn't talk...for a while.

Oh, yeah. And for the record, she meant to say adenoids.

Aren't they the cutest family?

My Greatest Struggle. GULP.

I can't believe I am doing this...or posting this picture...EESH. 

I envy women who "forget to eat" or can stop at just one cupcake. I don't think I have ever forgotten to eat and if you put a plate of cupcakes in front of me and left the room, they'd be disintegrated by the time you came back.

I have struggled with eating since I was fifteen years old. Before that, I was athletic and ate whatever I wanted. But, when I quit cheerleading and continued to eat junk food, the weight came on and my self-esteem plummeted. I pulled away from friends because of my struggle. It's ridiculous when I think about it, but somehow food became my "bestie". Always there and available...

I have been able to workout and keep weight at bay through the years, but this hip thing has made my struggle evident. There's only so much you can do to hide a muffin-top, a buddha-belly, and a big ol' booty and I'd rather not have a wardrobe full of black.

So, let me just call a spade a spade. I struggle with obsessive eating. I can laugh about it, grab another cupcake, and hide under the weight, but it doesn't make it better. 

Now that I am older and have popped out a few kids, I understand that I am not going to look like Gisele, no matter how hard I try. I have to be much more realistic with myself. I know weight does not define who I am, but when you are not "living" because you are battling within, there must be a change.

It's time to be Brianne again. To live life to the fullest. I owe it to myself and I owe it to my children.
With God's help, I can overcome anything. I don't want to do this to just be skinny (although I ain't gonna lie...that would be fabulous), or enjoy shopping again (wouldn't make me mad either), but to feel good again and gain self control.

I hesitated on posting this. I worried you might be disgusted and think less of me. But, then I remembered my promise in writing this blog. I promised to keep it real. To tell the whole truth. The ugly truth. And having all of you fabulous people out there cheering me on and holding me accountable couldn't hurt!

So, I am beginning a challenge: to take better care of myself. To gain back self-control and start living again. I want to be the best 'me' I can be. That's what I want for you, too. It's a choice. And I am choosing to remove food from my "Bestie" list....

Join me.

And let the Challenge begin.


PS. Leave me comments! I LOVE hearing from you! If you have something a little more private to say, just click the "contact me" button above.

Oh Snap! Shots Friday: Gone to the Dogs (& Cats)

All I can say is....wow.

I asked you to send me some pictures of your pets and... well, you did. Big time. I received more pictures of pets than I have of anything else...even kids. And you know people love their kids!

We don't have a pet right now (a fact my oldest continually nags me about), but we did have a dog a few years back before having kids. Her name was "Baby". She was like our kid. We bathed her, fed her, took her to the doctor, groomed her, played with and cuddled with her. She was the best dog. She didn't bark. She didn't bite. She was playful and sweet.

But she did have one nasty habit.

She'd leave us a "present" behind our recliner every time we had to board her. No exceptions. We even tried hiring a house sitter to stay with her while we went away. She still left us "the gift" upon our return.

But, as much as we hated cleaning up her "retaliation", we miss that dog. She was such a little personality.

So, here's to all of you who have little furry kids running around (or running) your house. Enjoy it all. Even..."the gifts". :)

In Real Life, 

Oh Snap!

We love our pets...

Rocco - Birmingham, Alabama

Ginger - Greenville, South Carolina

Gizmo - Montevallo,  Alabama

Zoey - Oxford, Alabama

We love dressing them up...

Chewie Hooie - Montgomery, Alabama

Kingston - Thomson, Georgia

 Thorn - Jacksonville, Florida

Bogey - Birmingham, Alabama

They make us laugh...

"I'll 'Eat More Chicken' if you give me a sample...." 

"Am I doing the "downward dog" correctly?" - Cooper, Helena, Alabama

"Oh...were you wanting to use this recliner?" - Thorn

"I am not going to sit on this nasty floor!" -  Bruiser, Carrollton, Georgia

"Is this your idea of  'a little off the top' ?"

"Could you please turn those bright lights off?" -  Smokey,  Greenville, South Carolina

                        

     "Hay Ma! I'm diggin' a hole to China!" - Dixie, White Plains, Alabama

"I think this Wii Fit might help me work off that extra catnip..." 
Gingersnap, Greenville, South Carolina

They're part of the family...

Guarding the Neighborhood - Bogey, with Natalie and Emmett 

Birmingham, Alabama

"Those two act like animals..." - Bogey, with Natalie and Emmett

They get into everything...

Comfy and Cozy in the Sink - Smokey, Greenville, South Carolina

"What does this do? Me-OOOOOWWWWW!"- Zeke, Oxford, Alabama

"Oh...Hey Mom. What? I've got a little something on my lip?"
- Bella, San Jose, California

"Maybe if I just lick a little off the side..."

"Gee...I didn't expect you to come home so early..." 

"What?! I heard you talking about a 'mud bath', so I just thought..." - Bella

"Maybe if I play dead she won't even notice I dug up her brand new window box..." 
- Jack, Mount Olive, Alabama

New doggie beds: BEFORE

New Doggie Beds: AFTER


THE GUILTY CULPRITS...

"Hi. Oh yeah, about the new doggie beds...um, thanks?"- Zoey & Roxy

"Charmin test: complete. However, this bear did not cooperate."
Jessie, (the shadow) Greenville, South Carolina

But best of all,

Pets teach us to stop and smell the flowers...

Bogey, as a puppy

Whew! See? I told you I had a lot turned in. They were so cute, though. I really enjoyed seeing all of your "kids". (and their messes...)

I hope you all had a fantastic Fourth of July! Ours was a "blast" (no pun intended)! This weekend is going to be full of housework...oh, joy. So, to make my days brighter, send me pics! Of anything! The funnier, the better.

Next week's theme is... (drumroll please) "Air Your Dirty Laundry" I want pics that deal with laundry. Laundry rooms, kids in the laundry basket, kids on the laundry machines, laundry disasters, piles of laundry, etc. Anything to do with laundry. That leaves it WIDE open... 

Go ahead and start snapping! I can't wait to see 'em.


PS. If you aren't a "follower", go ahead and join right now. It might take a sec, but you will get to be entered in my upcoming give-away. Details soon... I promise!

Slow Down Sista

I overdid it this past week. I was own my own again with the kids. I felt okay, so I put the crutches aside and did my thang.

And now, I can hardly walk.

Sooooo, back on crutches. And it's killing me! I am losing whatever physical fitness I had by not being able to workout each day. My mom snapped a picture of me sitting by the pool, holding my crutches and eating. There's nothing worse than a fat picture of yourself sitting in a filled-out chair and stuffing your face. It's like adding insult to injury. So, while Mom handed me the camera to snap one of her with the baby, I deleted them. I can not have those bad boys posted on Facebook. Yikes.

That being said, I recognize there is something I can do since I can't exercise. Eating like there is about to be a worldwide rationing of food, though, is not that thing. So, I am going to change some areas of my life that I can control, like increasing my fruit and veggie intake and eating less process foods.

I started by joining an organic co-op. I picked up the box of healthy goodness last Thursday. There were five Peruvian bananas (from Peru...Does that make me a banana snob?), four Valencia oranges, cherries, blueberries, four white peaches, collard greens, two Mexican tomatoes of some kind, two zucchini, summer onions, carrots with edible greens, basil, and kohlrabi.

It was yummy, but there wasn't enough fruit to last us three days in our house, which meant another big expensive order or a trip to the grocery store. Lance and I took an hour to cut everything up. It was quite time consuming. Call me lazy, but I hate chopping, dicing, washing, slicing, and peeling produce. I'm one of those people who buy the produce whole to save money, only to "rediscover" it again a few days after it has expired substantially.

It's a vicious cycle. One I must break.

So, no organic co-op for me. Too expensive for too little food. I guess I will try the Farmer's Market next week. Maybe I can find some local produce that I can buy in large quantities and not have to break the bank. Take a gander at the pic I snapped for you guys after I picked up from the co-op this week. Guess you can say I still have some bad habits to break...