Wednesday, September 5, 2012

My Final Post. Well, Not Really.

Can I be brutally honest?

I've hit a rough patch on this journey of finding myself.

Life as a wife with a traveling husband, a toddler and an active eight year-old is proving to be a lot. I have two upcoming women's Bible studies (one of which I am leading), a speaking engagement (of which I am stoked about!), and Opie just started Fall Baseball. Throw in sewing lessons, church work and writing a blog and it's a wonder I'm not in a padded room wearing a snug white jacket. 

Case in point: 

Today, as I was leaving for Opie's baseball practice, I drove to our mailbox to pick up the mail. (You have to drive around to the back of our house to an adjacent street.) As I was driving home from Opie's practice, it hit me. I never got the mail. I had driven to the mailbox, done a complete one-eighty and had never even given the mail a second thought.  

Yes. It is time for a mental breakdown break.



I love this blog. It's such a joy to write to you about life and my craziness. But, lately, it's become too much. My marriage and my role as a Mommy have been suffering. And my relationship with the One who gives me the strength to endure all of the craziness has gotten shuffled around. This can't be.

Today, I got on my knees for the first time in a long time. Oh, I pray all of the time. But, it'd been a while since I had physically kneeled to pray. There is something so powerful in that. I simply asked God to help me be still. 

                                                                                                                                                               www.freedigitalimages.net
So, I am taking a break. 

To be still.

To listen.

To reflect.

To be healed and changed.

To play with my boys and mentally be there in that moment.


To live a day without blogging about it.

To do away with my Pin-security. 

To put the kids to bed, without hurrying. 



To snuggle with my husband instead of sitting next to him with a computer in my lap. (Do you know how thrilled he will be to hear this?)

You see ladies, it is not possible to have it all. To do one thing, we must give up something else. 

Every day we make choices on what we do with our time. Those choices reveal what our heart desires.
Is it money? Fame? Popularity? Am I trying to prove something to others? To myself? 

The truth is, I already know I am deeply loved. By my Creator. By my family. My husband. My children. And it is that love that keeps me going. Striving. To constantly be asking, "Lord, change me. Into the person You want me to be. For You. For them. For me." 

This isn't good-bye. This is just 'you won't be seeing as much of me for a while'. I will have to post occasional stories of my crazy antics (just to make you laugh), deep thoughts I have to put into words and whatever amazing things come my way. I even have a gorgeous jewelry give-away to do. (So, you know I won't be going too far!)

But, I must live my life in the season I am given. And right now, this is the Oh-my-word-how-can-I-manage-all-of-this-insanity-without-looking-like-a-trainwreck Season. 

Now, don't lose any sleep tonight. (okay, I flatter myself) You ain't heard the last of me yet. I'm just gonna limit my writing to when I can actually do it without sacrificing my kiddos, my marriage, and my sanity. 

It's a thin thread, people. A thin thread. :)

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PS. Thanks for all of your support, comments and love. It is why I do this. I can't wait to see what God has in store, so when I return full-force, oh, the stories we will share!

26 comments:

  1. I love you girl!

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  2. You might find you feel less stressed about blogging when you aren't trying to blog daily and think of witty stuff to say. I bet taking a step back will re-ignite your creativity, and then it will become more enjoyable and more seamless with your life! : ) phew, that was a lot!

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    1. You are so right, chick! And I love your long comment. Phew!

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  3. You are talented, and even better, deeply rooted in faith and family. There is a season for everything, including your writing career. It's coming. Little ones DON'T stay little forever. I relate to everything your saying. We have to live life, not just write about it. And, this is why I'm sad I sometimes only blog once a week. But, if I live a day like it's my LAST day, the blog would truly be the LAST thing on my list. I can always count on you for honesty and perspective. God bless you no matter what season you're in. Much love!

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    1. I agree. THanks for the advice and support. It means the world, girl!

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  4. Sorry, one more thing...I felt like the Lord gave me a mantra right after having my second and trying to teach full time... "The best I can do is be fully present wherever I am." Hope that makes sense.

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  5. Yes, I missed you several times when visiting, as you and your computer were in a different place. One editorial a week almost drives me insane, and I have 25 years experience writing. One blog a week would be a wonderful achievement for you, and your blogs are so good. Love you, and I'm behind you for what you think is best for you. --Mom

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    1. Thanks girl! I will miss being on here, but it's time for a break!

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  7. Oh I miss you already :). You always seem to put things in such wonderful perspective. I always love your honesty and humor. Good luck on your Bible studies and speaking engagements and most of all HAVE FUN with the family.

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    1. Thanks so much! I will miss being on, here, but know I am making the right decision. I appreciate the encouragement and support so much!

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  8. Bri, I love your priorities, and I am sure your family will too. You're making a good choice. Take care of yourself and the most important things in your life.

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  9. God Bless You, Bri. I admire your faith and priorities! We will be here when you find the time to fill us in on your fun wirh the family! Carol

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  10. I have done the same thing and only blog when I have time... Which clearly has been VERY rarely. Love you bri!

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    1. Thanks Ashley! You have been a rock for me through this! Thanks!

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  11. You? You are brave... blessed... wise... and will be missed in between musings. I am so looking forward to reading about what God has in store for you as you navigate this season of life.

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    1. You? You are a gift. Thanks for just listening and being there. Maybe one day we can actually meet in person!! HA!

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  12. I am going to miss you, enjoy your time tho! :)

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    1. I'll be around...just sporadically! Thanks!

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  13. Maybe we can actually hang out now???

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    1. You are busier than me, lady! The trick is for both of us to be available at the same time! HA!

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  14. Awesome post! So true. I've been keeping up with you on this and loving your antics. I miss the good days when it was our old group of girls laughing so hard at your stories at Starbucks. You are doing a great thing by taking a break and living the life that's right in front of you. LOVE YOU!
    Wesley

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    1. Thanks Wesley! Those words mean a lot. I miss you guys, too. I am always amazed at your ability to make everything look seamless and grand! I need some pointers sister! Love you guys and enjoy looking at your precious family's pics. Those kids are just too cute! I appreciate the encouragement more than you know!

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