My husband asked me one evening, “What’s on your bucket list?”
“I don't have one,” I replied, shrugging my shoulders. I was a busy wife and Mom with too much responsibility to sit and make a list of daydreams. And besides that, traveling to the seven wonders of the world sure wasn't possible on that budget, so why waste my time making a list of things I couldn't afford to do? A bucket list seemed pointless and unattainable. Besides, I had a fine life at the time in good ol' Alabama. The fact that my high school dreams hadn't come true just proved my point. That eventually, you have to grow up and forget about silly young dreams, right? We can't all be stars on Broadway or do documentaries on whales, penguins and dolphins.
“You’ve got to have a bucket list!” he said. “There has to be things you want to do.”
Sure, there were things I wanted to do, but none of them seemed worthy of a bucket list. I mean, I always wanted to sky-dive, but getting thrills didn't seem to excite me anymore. I had always wanted to go to Italy, but it’s not like I had an ideal itinerary planned out. Come to think of it, I hadn’t really dreamed since I was a teenager.
So, I thought back to some of my earliest childhood dreams. Let's just say I was a big dreamer.
Dream Number One.
The tour bus of the New Kids on the Block would probably break down in my hometown. They would need to use my phone. (even though I lived miles from the interstate and on top of a mountain) I'd meet Joe McIntyre. We’d fall in love and get married.
But, alas, the tour bus never broke down and so dream numero uno was out.
Dream Number Two.
I would sing on Star Search and win. I’d become rich and famous and marry Joe McIntyre. We'd live in a huge mansion with a ballroom in the backyard. I even designed the floor plans of our mansion on my mother's computer. (Yes, I really did.)
That didn't work out either. I took voice lessons. I practiced singing in front of my mirror to Whitney Houston's "The Greatest Love of All". I sang in talent shows and choir concerts. (FYI, I did place second at an Oxford Quintard Mall talent competition singing a mean rendition of "Eternal Flame" from the Bangles.) But, much to my dismay, I was never "discovered" and Hollywood never called.
I was banking on one of those two things happening, but just in case the stars weren’t aligned correctly, I had a last and final plan.
I’d go on Oprah.
I'd tell her my life-long dream of meeting Joe McIntyre and she would invite me to be on her show to make that dream finally come true.
But, Oprah never returned my email….okay, emails. (And now she's off the air, so that dream really is dashed)
So, it was safe to say, I needed new dreams. My own bucket list.
But, I was stuck. I couldn’t think of one dream. What was wrong with me?
The truth was I had quit dreaming. I had gotten married to a good man, popped out a couple of kids, and figured being a good wife and Mommy was living the dream. That seemed noble, right?
But, I was disappointed. Not with my husband or my kids. It just seemed like I had lost my spark. I didn’t get excited anymore. Life was predictable and I was bored inside. I knew God had given me desires and dreams for a reason, but how could I get back in touch with those deep down inside of me? It had been a long time since I'd thought about stuff I wanted to do. It felt selfish and irresponsible. But, I grabbed a pen and started the list.
The first thing I wrote down?
Meet Joe McIntyre.
My husband laughed. "What? Are you serious? That is your first thing on your bucket list?"
I had just gotten back from a New Kids on the Block concert with my friend, Nikki. We'd had a blast singing old songs, giggling like silly teenagers, screaming at the top of our lungs and reminiscing how Joe and Jordan made us dream as little girls. It was my original dream and, by golly, it was still a dream!
I was amazed at how excited I got. It felt wonderful to start imagining things I could do again. I set goals. I wrote down anything that popped in my head. Some were little. But, they were all important. I had begun to get back in touch with me again. I wanted to be all God had intended for me to be. The truth was, I was more than a wife and a mom. I was a woman with talents and abilities. The possibilities to where I could go and what I could do were limitless!
My list may seem ridiculous to you, but, that’s okay. It’s my list. It’s forever changing and growing and I love it. Your list will be unique to you. Even if you only write down one thing, if it's in your heart, then it's a great place to start! (Hey, that almost sounded inspirational!)
But, what if it doesn't happen? What if your "dreams" don't come true?
It doesn’t matter. Chances are you’ll do more than you ever could have done just sitting back and letting life pass you by.
So, what are you waiting for? Grab a pen and paper.
Dust off some old dreams, think of some new ones and start your own bucket list.
Let me know some of them. Publish a comment about a dream you have. Maybe it will spark a dream in someone else!
Here’s my official “Bucket List”. Feel free to steal any dream you want!
1) Meet Joe McIntyre (uh-huh!)
2) Run in a Touch Mudder Race
3) Write a successful blog
4) Finish my interior design degree
5) Become a successful designer
6) Camp in Africa with my boys
7) Build our dream home (a cross between a log cabin & an English cottage)
8) Go to Hawaii
9) Adopt a little girl from China
10) Hike a mountain with my husband, in a foreign country
11) Be a speaker at Women of Faith conferences
Here's to Crazy Dreams!
'Til Next Time,